i am not these thoughts that constantly worry,
want to problem solve,
too concerned about
what the future holds
for my only daughter
who thrives
in the company of her tween tribes.
young, burgeoning ladies
like vibrant winter candycane amaryllis buds
who support each other,
growing in their own individual ways,
figuring out how to
fulfill their most untamed dreams.
--
these thoughts pass through my mind.
these thoughts are not me.
where there is so much hurt and frustration
and i am unable to help, i feel powerless.
all i can do is listen.
i am not the one fearful
of acknowledging the (im)perfections
about family who gather for the holidays,
oblivious to each other's truths.
loving family is more.
i stand on the sidelines unable to speak up.
shhh. know your place.
the urge to offer saving grace embraces me.
these thoughts are not me.
i am that voice whose heart
is out there in the open.
feel that snowy wind on a brisk traipse
that suddenly brings a depth of comfort?
this, my heart, is what I am.
