9.11.08

Pamilya

We were honored to have been invited to my parents' friends' -- Tita Rebecca & Tito Nanding's -- retirement party at The Liberty House (Jersey City).  Mom couldn't bring herself to attend.  But I was happy to see all of our old family friends, many of whom were at Dad's service and our wedding too.  They all expressed their concern and asked how Mom was doing.  And those who hadn't been able to make the service shared their loving wishes.  I suppose Mom & I are grieving differently.  While she needs to be alone and find her way back into Life on her own timeframe, I want to surround myself with all those who knew my Dad, and I want to share in their memories of him.  

I chatted a bit with all of them.  When I sat with the Domingos, Tita Maring grabbed my hand and said, I miss your dad.  He would be out there dancing right now.  I responded, I miss him too.  I needed to hear that.  It was good to hear that.  I'm glad we went.   
I was a little overwhelmed at the 10am church service.  During Communion, the children's choir sang Where My Father Is, or was it In My Father's House?  In any case, while the song was about God and heaven, I could only think about my Dad somewhere in Eternity. Yesterday afternoon while I meditated, I had passing visions of my Dad on my wedding day which brought me to tears, of course. During our father-daughter dance, I was ferklempt since he'd just had two stents put in the April before, and all I could think was, Wow, he's here . . . we're here. And Dad said,  Don't cry. As difficult as it was to accept -- when Dad made his decision to stop all treatment, a good friend shared with me, Your Dad got to see you get married.    

A mindful walk
We had a chance to catch up with one of my old bosses from GCWW who lives in Bayhead.  Joan treated us to a lovely lunch at Jack's Wharfside in Point Pleasant.  Seeing Joan outside of what used to be work is a welcome outing.  She's like a family aunt you don't mind visiting because she spoils you so much and is so excited to hear all about you and your life.  Later we headed shoreside to do some light fishing. Well, Al fished . . . and I went on a mindful walk along Spring Lake's boardwalk.  A mindful walk does much for the soul.    

Afterwards, we stopped by Freehold to visit with Wendy, Ed & the kids. I'm glad that they didn't mind us imposing on their Sunday night family time especially since they're so busy what with the kids' schedules. It was comforting to just sit & catch up with them. I am truly blessed to have lucked out with wonderful brothers- and sisters-in law.  

Makes me appreciate all that is behind 'ohana / pamilya.