fuzzy fall flowers
as i saunter for lunchfare
Interesting what happens in the moment. I was downtown at a pre-proposal RFP meeting for work and happened upon an old colleague, who shared that he was going to be a father and that he & his wife are due in February. Naturally, I congratulated him and wished them well. In my well-wishing, I shared that we had just begun our expectant (adoption) process. But then I found myself unnerved the rest of the afternoon. Why did I want to share, should I be sharing too? Was our news just as worthy? Upon following up with an email exchange later, he congratulated me. And I insisted, no congratulations quite yet as it would be a long wait and process (14-24 months) -- maybe I'm Jewish that way. Jews don't believe in baby showers & such fanfare. Nothing is worth celebrating until the little one has actually arrived. Anything can happen before then. In any expectant anticipation, especially that of wanting so much to experience parenthood, worries and excitement overwhelm me simultaneously.
And then there's the friendly Pilipino maintenance man in my (work) building, who frequently holds the elevator for me. Every day, Christopher (from Bulacan in the Philippines) & I exchange sincere pleasantries, he asks me about my work, and I find myself wanting to make more-than-nice, make an effort to get to know him, because he is Kuya - kababayan. And I'm reminded of the magic of perchance.
Just like when we finally meet our little one.